


Devil's Haircut

by JehBeeEh



Series: Ahead by a Century [48]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, Dialogue Heavy, Domestic Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Just lots of silly fluff, M/M, Not much point to this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-04-17
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:47:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23693377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JehBeeEh/pseuds/JehBeeEh
Summary: “He didn’t just get a haircut. Your husband dared him to.”“Now hold up, that is NOT what happened. We made a bet, not the same thing. He was a willing participant, we both had consequences to adhere to here. I wouldn’t just dare him to chop his hair off.”
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Natasha Romanov, Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Series: Ahead by a Century [48]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1514069
Comments: 25
Kudos: 182





	Devil's Haircut

“I offer to help you guys out, and this is how you repay me?!” Natasha’s voice rang on speaker phone before Steve could say anything.

“Hi Nat. You’re on speaker phone, Tony’s here too. But you’ll have to be a bit more specific, not sure what you might be referring to here,” Steve answered, having a fairly good idea what she might be referencing.

“What did you do to my boyfriend!” Natasha enunciated over the phone.

Tony glared playfully at Steve, who gave him a boyish grin in return before going back to the veggies he was cutting.

“Technically, _I_ didn’t do anything, although I did offer to do it myself, but he turned me down. We did go to a barber so I wouldn’t wreck him completely. You should be proud of him, really.” Steve popped a piece of the pepper he’d been chopping in his mouth as he waited for Natasha’s reply.

“Why? What did I do to you?” Nat sounded annoyed now.

“It’s not that bad, doll,” he heard Bucky chime in the background.

“See? He likes it! Let the man live a little, Natasha,” Steve added, unhelpfully.

“Okay, time out here,” Tony interrupted. “Can I get a bit of context , ‘cause I have no clue what’s happening right now.”

“Your husband ruined my boyfriend, Tony.” Natasha lamented.

“As Steve noted, you’ll need to be way more specific,” Tony dodged a poke in the side from his husband, both of them laughing now.

“Nothing about this is funny. James’s hair is gone!”

“Barnes got a haircut?” Tony asked Steve quietly, confused by whole situation.

“He didn’t just get a _haircut_. Your husband dared him to.”

“Now hold up, that is NOT what happened. We made a bet, not the same thing. He was a willing participant, we both had consequences to adhere to here. I wouldn’t just dare him to chop his hair off.” Steve tried to defend himself, but he had a feeling it was a lost cause at this point. He sighed. “Come on, Nat, he looks good!”

“See? Steve thinks I’m handsome,” Bucky added, and Steve rolled his eyes at his beat friend’s cocky tone.

“I did not go that far, just said it looked good.” Steve corrected quickly.

“Screw you, I look very handsome right now,” Bucky sounded like a petulant child, and Steve loved it.

“But I liked the longer hair, and the man bun. It looked much better than this,” Natasha whined.

“Can I get a picture or something? Are we talking mullet? Buzzcut? Some flames designed on the sides?” Tony jumped in, still incredibly confused.

“FRIDAY, can you pull up the pictures from last night on my phone, please? My hands are gross,” Steve asked, hearing groans at the other end of the line. “Oh, stop being assholes, you have my old Nest, it does the same thing.”

He nodded towards the phone when he saw the pictures had loaded. The brunette came around behind him and picked up the phone that lay next to Steve, scrolling through pictures of the two young men at a bar – the same ones Steve had sent to their group chat yesterday – until he got to one of the two boys at a barber shop. Steve had apparently documented the whole event, some shots much blurrier than others likely due to the giant grin Tony could see on his face in the mirror, which ended with pictures of Bucky pulling his tongue out at Steve, but looking like he got a perfectly acceptable haircut, no flashbacks to the 90s involved.

“Looks good, Barnes!” Tony called out as he put the phone back down.

“Thank you. See Tasha, it’s good!” Bucky was the one whining now.

“Ugh! You boys are utterly useless. I quit. And you seriously owe me, Rogers.” Natasha yelled out, finally accepting defeat.

“Think of it as dating a whole new guy, that’s as dumb as Bucky was, but prettier.” Steve wasn’t fast enough to dodge his husband’s jab, yelping in pain.

“I poked him for you, Nat,” Tony let her know.

“Just because I picked the wrong team, doesn’t mean I’m dumb.” Bucky replied.

“Whatever! I’m right and I still have the beard to prove it.” Steve was smug about his win, and was not afraid to flaunt it.

“You were going to shave your BEARD?!” Tony looked at his husband, eyes bulging and jaw dropped.

“NOW do you get it, Tony?” Natasha replied, like this explained everything.

“You are not allowed to get rid of that. EVER!” Tony continued, as if Natasha hadn’t even spoken.

“On that note, I’ll go yell at James a bit more. Toodles.”

“Enjoy the make up sex!” Steve threw in before she hung up.

“Seriously, your beard?!” Tony still hadn’t let it go and was staring at Steve with a disgruntled look on his face.

Steve was too amused by his husband’s horror at the thought of him losing his beard. “I knew I wasn’t losing the bet, don’t worry. Beard isn’t going anywhere.”

“What was the bet anyways?”

“Who’d win the Stanley Cup last night. Was game 7, so it was happening for sure. And I was right.”

“But that is a crap shoot. You easily could have lost!”

“Nope. Cause we’ve had some form of a bet running for the past few years, and Buck always loses. I swear, it’s like he’s doing it on purpose at this point. I don’t know why or how, but he always loses.”

Tony eyed him incredulously for a minute, then leaned in for a kiss, which Steve happily gave him.

“Don’t worry, I wouldn’t be as stupid as Bucky and agree to something like this without checking with you first.” Steve smirked at Tony’s raised eyebrow.

“Technically you _did_ agree to it, but you didn’t have to go through with it. Not quite the same thing. Don’t try to throw Barnes under the bus there. You aren’t so innocent, mister.” Tony wrapped his arms around Steve’s waist, making a show of nuzzling into Steve’s beard.

“Hey, I gave him the option of going today instead of trying to find a barber that was open late on a Saturday night. He was the one that wanted to do it right after the game and not wait for Nat to discourage all this. I swear, I am way more innocent that I seem here.” The boyish grin was back, and Tony had to kiss him again.

“Whatever you say, mister. But you are NOT allowed to shave the beard. Ever.”

“You wouldn’t have minded if I came home with a different haircut?”

“Meh, hair grows back pretty fast, it wouldn’t be as devastating.”

“You make it sound like seeing my face would be some kind of horrible hardship.” Steve laughed. “I swear this beard grows back just as fast as my hair. More so, I think on some days.”

“Just not the same. Stop arguing with me.”

“Fine. And, by the way, Bucky was going to get a haircut regardless. He hates his hair in the summer and always complains. Really, I was just the scapegoat here.” Steve tried to hide his grin, but Tony’s laugh made it hard to keep up the façade.

“Aw, so you took one for the team? Get Nat would be mad at you, instead of him?”

“Yup. That’s me. Self-sacrificing idiot. All for the greater good.”

“My hero. As long as you don’t jump out of airplanes or through windows, I think I can live with that.”

“Never. That would be stupid. This is me helping world peace. Don’t worry, Nat will be over it in a couple of days.”

“Well, I am not over the trauma of learning I almost lost my husband to a stupid bet-“

“What?!” Steve laughed at the ridiculousness of Tony’s statement.

“You heard me, very traumatic. You owe me for that.”

Steve kissed Tony’s forehead before going to rinse his hands. “Get in line, apparently.”

“How about –“ Tony slipped in behind Steve at the sink and weaved his hand under Steve’s t-shirt, stroking over his stomach, “you get that pot in the oven, and I use the time it cooks to show you just how much I appreciate my husband as is, beard included.”

“Oh.” Steve’s breath hitched as one of Tony’s hands grazed one of his nipples. He managed to turn around so he could get his lips on Tony’s, if only for a few seconds, before agreeing to his plan. “I’m sure that can be arranged.”

“And, no more making bets involving your face. I only married you for your good looks, after all.”

“I guess we’re even then. Only married you cause of your ass.” Tony let out of bark of laughter as Steve pulled him in closer for another kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> In my missing of hockey, and thinking of playoff beards and the Stanley Cup, and Beck comes on the radio, this happened.   
> Needed a silly little drabble after spending a day writing something a bit off-brand for me (shocker!!), so had to put this one down.  
> Hope you enjoyed, and that you and yours are safe and healthy <3 :)


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